Paying the Toll

How silence helps you speak a foreign language

Welcome, aspiring polyglot! In my classes, we usually start speaking around week 6. Of course it is broken speech, but everyone starts somewhere. Well, some people start nowhere, but if you are going to start you have to start somewhere. Through that process I have learned a few things. The topic of today’s discussion is paying the toll up front.

The Toll

This could be any number of things and depends slightly on the person. Some people will see the toll as being discomfort. Others will see it as embarrassment. A few might even view it as shame. What the toll actually is, though, is silence. Now, that silence can feel uncomfortable and embarrassing and even shameful at times. But the true payment is merely silence.

When you are first learning a new language, especially at the six week mark, you are going to be translating in your head native language to target language. There is quite literally no way around this; and the more time you spend doing it the less time you will have to spend doing it. My students hear that exact phrase a lot. I say it almost every day because it is almost always true.

Personally, I would rather sprint up the side of the mountain than take 1000 switchbacks to the top. But I have written about that before, so if you would like an insight into my methodology, read this:

The translation that takes place in your head is not instantaneous. Especially not in the first or second or even third month. If it were, there would be no reason to worry about any of this. You need time in order to get your sentences out, particularly if you would like them to come out well. You will necessarily have to fill that time. Since you can’t fill it with language, silence is the only other option.

The collection

Collection of the toll happens one of two ways from my observations. My personal preference is up front collection. I would much rather spend 5 or 10 or even 15 seconds in silence, thinking my sentence all the way through than stumble into the toll collector later in my formulation. This is where most people get stuck.

No one really wants to sit in silence. It is not an enjoyable way to practice or learn a new language. It is, however, necessary. If not up front than in the middle, or worse at the end. That said, it makes sense. After all, you probably spend little to no time in silence when speaking your native language. Why would you? Everything is automatic.

But it took you years to get to that point and that fact can be far too easy to forget in the middle of trying to memorize the same verb for the 12th time. I understand that. So what people tend to do is try to run before they can walk. By that I mean they start speaking without really having thought through their entire sentence. This might work in your native language, but not so much in a new language.

When you do that what inevitably ends up happening is that the person will jump into a response and begin translating word by word. Since language is contextual, this is already one step towards failure. An extra hurdle to get over that is being placed unnecessarily due to an attempt to avoid discomfort. Ironically leading to a more sustained period of discomfort.

As you translate word by word your brain is now working on two problems simultaneously. Forming the rest of a coherent thought and simultaneously translating that thought before knowing what that thought fully is. Unsurprisingly this leads to both a botched translation and a loss of the idea that was meant to be expressed.

Once both are lost, the discomfort/shame/embarrassment is drastically worse than it otherwise would have been. That’s why I prefer to pay the toll up front; and why I tell everyone with whom I work to do the same. Spending 10 seconds up front to complete your thoughts before diving into the translation feels worse at first because you are uncomfortable before ever opening your mouth.

However, that initial discomfort is quickly alleviated by successful transmission of ideas. Each subsequent success will be further proof that you don’t have to fill every silent moment with broken speech. Sooner rather than later you will realize that it is just easier on you to give yourself time to think. A skill that you should probably bring into your native language as well.

The ROI

You do not have to pay without expecting something in return. Remember that when you are feeling down about your progress. Paying this toll, learning to be comfortable in silence, will have massive, positive repercussions throughout not only your language acquisition, but your life. Thinking through what you want to say is a skill very few people have.

By merely taking the time to let yourself think, you are separating yourself from the majority. It will make you a better thinker. You will become more compassionate because you will see why people are struggling, not just that they are struggling. Most importantly, you will have to spend far less time in silence than if you spend all of your brain power trying to fill every moment.

That is why this can be so difficult. It’s a lot like investing. At first, it feels like a loss because you are giving up something that you otherwise would have immediately accessible. But with each “deposit” you make, you bring yourself one step closer to never needing to stay silent again. Of course, once you master this skill, it might just be something you never stop doing.

Conclusion

Most of the things I write about can be put into the “easier said than done” box. I understand that. But difficult to do is kind of the entire point. If you want easier done than said, Duolingo is available as an option to you. Since you are here, though, reading this, I believe you are willing to put in the effort to master this new skill.

Silence, after all, is a skill. Remarkably few people are comfortable in silence and even fewer people seek it out intentionally. Try to be one of the few. At least for a while until your brain catches up with your heart. It will be difficult, but you can do difficult things and be great. So go out and do some difficult things and become great. I am rooting for you.

If this post made you rethink your approach, the next step is replacing what isn’t working. My free downloadable PDFs give you exercises and frameworks that no app provides. Real output practice designed to get you speaking, not just tapping.

Want to skip the trial-and-error entirely? My private students go from zero to conversational in 12 weeks with a course built around their goals, their schedule, and their life. See what that looks like.